August Crazy Contest Entry Two:
Jen invited me to join her for a dinner party one summer's even many moons ago. She prompted me that her and her boyfriend were experiencing problems in their relationship, and to expect some peculiar behavior from him. I figured they'd had a typical argument, and assured her they'd be fine. To my bewilderment, "Pete" was exceptionally strange that evening in his mannerisms and conversation. It was at dinner that I figured out what was wrong.
He announced proudly at the table that he'd decided to live a lifestyle of a different sort, that he was by nature the Alpha male of a dog pack. My girlfriend cringed in embarrassment.
I didn't know if he was joking until their dog sauntered in the room and Pete proceeded to "dominate" the poor creature. I stared gape-jawed as the poor beast rolled onto it's back in submission and Pete got down on all fours and bit it's scruff. I shot a look of sympathy to Jen, and the room went silent.
The awkwardness subsided when Pete and the dog went outside. Until Jen's Dad bellowed "BAH, YOUR BOYFRIEND IS AN IDIOT!!". We craned to see out the window he was standing in front of. The dog ran past full tilt heading down the street, followed moments later by Pete in pursuit, and completely in the nude.
We decided to make a quick and polite exit.
My husband whispered in my ear as we left that it was a 'good time to go before Pete tried humping anyone's leg'. I snorted louder than I meant to.
As for Jen, she broke up with Pete soon after, and has since married a nice human :)