I am sick.
I have a terrible head cold.
... due to my relentlessly inconvenient and unfortunately necessary day job, I am in the office, sixty miles from home.
Jesse was kind enough to put me to bed early last night, and that helped a LOT, but it sure didn’t cure me completely.
I will spare you the disgusting symptoms, but this is going to be a long day. I am only going to make it through with many drugs, most of which will slow time to a crawl and kill a bunch of brain cells.
My only consolation is that I can run around to the offices of the people I don’t like and sneeze on their keyboards, lick their computer mice, and breathe all over their phone receivers.