New Spring Things

So, I finally got one of my new spring products up and listed. (well, I listed it last week, but I’ve been busy. You know the excuses by now.)

I’ve been pretty happy with the body butter I have for sale, but a few people asked for something thicker – so here you go – Body Frosting!

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22438885

The first scent I listed is Hula Girl, a mango/coconut blend, but I have some others in mind – like Lavender Honey, Bahama Mama (pineapple and lime), and uh…. Okay, fine, I have TWO others in mind. I’m toying with Magnolia, Tuberose, Amaretto Tiramisu…

...maybe...

...Maybe not.

So what scents would you like to see? Hit me with your suggestions!

All Work and No Play

I’ve been really working lately on trying to find a reasonable balance between work and leisure. I have a day job, and a side job, and a home business – work lurks around every corner for me. That’s fine, except after a few years I’ve begun to get a wee bit testy, which says to me that it’s time for a little play.

Of course, when I intend to take a day off, I sit down with my morning coffee and turn on the news, just while I wake up. I’m generally okay for the first thirty seconds or so, until somebody mentions the economy and I run screaming for the soap room, because god forbid I pass up a dollar, ever.

That extra day of work really doesn’t make enough difference to justify the exhaustion or the lack of energy. In the long run, it doesn’t really make me any more productive. I’d be better off if I took an actual day off…. If only I could make myself do it.

Of course, I do stop several times during my working weekends to walk the dog. On the plus side, it’s outdoors in the fresh air. On the minus end, well, it’s still tiring.

I know I’m not the only one out there looking for ways to strike a healthy balance, or trying to have fun without going broke. So I went off and googled “cheap fun”. I think they got the cheap part right, but these folks have a LOT to learn about fun.

They suggested:

Learn a hobby. I got one, it turned into a business.

Start a website. I have three, kill me please.

Attend a free seminar. Nobody thinks that’s fun, NOBODY.

Do they look like they're smiling?

I found suggestions to go on a picnic, which we did last summer.

It was okay…. Mostly it was a long dog walk in a giant wildlife park, followed by some incredibly sandpaper-dry sandwiches and then a ride home with a queasy dog who had more sandwich than was probably good for him.

I think most of the cheap fun ideas must be aimed at people with kids, since there are a lot of suggestions for facepainting and wiffleball, and random things like prank-calling the grandparents.

The most amusing suggestion was to stick your finger in the cat’s mouth when he yawns, but this would require me to go get a cat (which would thrill Bander no end and make life mighty exciting but not in a good way).

The same article listed bubblegum, which is certainly cheap but a bit lacking in the fun department.

The good news in all of this is that I like just being home hanging out with hubby, since he’s the human equivalent of a barrel of monkeys. Maybe I’ll put him in a little dress and teach him to ride a trike.

Who’s in charge here?

I was on the phone earlier today with Jesse, giggling like an idiot over a joke I made up about a bus driver and his lunch – you know, one of those things that’s HILARIOUS because when you originally said it, it was three am and you were kind of giddy from lack of sleep?

He said if I was feeling all that funny I should write a blog post.

So of course I’m just sitting here blinking, totally unable to be even the least bit interesting.

It isn’t my fault, really. I blame lack of sleep, and for that, I blame THE DOG.

You see, it’s spring, and we live in an area with a lot of open fields. We’ve had all sorts of beasties in the area, and because of our avocado tree, lots of them have visited our yard. Mice and rats are the usual. Last week we even had a big raccoon, which quite frankly scared the dickens out of me. I had seen raccoons before, and somehow thought of them as small cute creatures with human-like paws.

The one in our yard had human-like paws, but small and cute were not words I’d use.

Enormous and raunchy are more accurate.

Well, not really that big, but certainly the size of a medium-sized dog.

Way bigger than I expected, and severely deficient in the cuteness area.

I was pretty sure we had El Chupacabra in our yard.

Anyway, little skittering creatures in the yard, and the dog is thrilled because his JOB is to patrol the yard and keep critters out of the house. Our standing rule with the dog, when we go to bed, is that he is supposed to wake us up when he needs us. Currently, he interprets this as “whenever I really want to go outside and chase things”.

Also, since he has a fairly limited vocabulary, he isn’t any good at telling us exactly why he desperately wants to go outside, so in case it’s an emergency (note the clever euphemism there) I get up and let him out.

Jesse and I both wake up when this happens, so my memory of the past week or so includes a lot of staggering around in the dark, often so groggy that I don’t really remember whether it happened or whether I just dreamed it.

Last night was the kicker. Bander came in and woke us up – causing me to get out of bed and put clothes on and then drag myself down the stairs. I was just standing there wondering where I put his leash when I realized that the dog was not even with me.

You know where he was? Sleeping on my side of the bed, that’s where. The sneaky sod came and woke me up and tricked me into going downstairs so he could bogart my mattress space. And he was so cute when I came back that I just rubbed his belly and spent the rest of the night cliffhanging so I didn’t have to move him.

I TOLD you guys the dog was in charge. Now do you believe me?

The Swarm

I finally got enough samples together to put soap sample packs back up on my Etsy site. And you know what? Apparently people were waiting, because I’m getting swarmed like somebody wearing bacon underwear at the zoo. Four slices of soap in each package, and I’ve just had the fourth convo of the day with people who want three and four at a time.

So samples will be GONE soon.

Also, I had a batch of Arrogant Bastard beer soap listed, and it sold out in under 48 hours. It took a month to cure the damn thing, and I was out again before the weekend was over.

You people are NOT helping my to-do list.

We don’t have a new dog

My husband is the most patient man in the universe.

He needs to be, because he lives with me, and I generally have enough schemes cooking to make Lucy and Ethel look like normal people.

Here’s the current situation.

We have some neighbors two doors down who got a puppy. An active breed, and they have small children. In an effort to keep ranting to a minimum, I’ll just say that the puppy got locked in the back yard and neglected, to the point where I had some long discussions with Animal Control on where neglect ended and abuse began.

Many of our neighbors agreed that the situation was very sad and the puppy was neglected. They all agreed that somebody should say something. Then they went in their houses and hid like a bunch of pantywaists.

I kept quiet as long as I could stand it – six minutes, by my watch – and then somehow, through sneakiness and eloquence combined with a big spoonful of bullshit, got the neighbor to agree that it would be a big favor to Jesse and I if we could walk his dog for him, and got permission to go into his yard any time we wanted to and take his dog.

The conversation even ended with smiles and laughter.

I still don’t know quite how I managed it.

This is where the saintly qualities of my husband come in. Because while I talked the neighbor into dog walking arrangements, I go to work every morning, and guess who has to actually WALK a desperate-for-attention, crazed, high energy, puppy?

Yep, the hubs. And he has to walk our dog, too.

Now our dog, Bander, is gentle and well behaved, but he had a mission in life, and that’s to put in more miles than Lance Armstrong on a daily basis. Our not-dog, Duke, is so happy to be out of the yard for a change that he puts in some serious mileage also. On the other hand, it does have some rewards – because here’s the face Duke makes when he sees us now:I have the wild ideas to save the world. Jesse does the heavy lifting and the trench digging to make it happen. He’s awesome.

I'd like to point out that I'm embarrassed now, and that she often exaggerates.
-Jesse